Wednesday, 8 August 2007

i am so angry today.

im so angry today that just now when my maid came in complaining about my room being in a mess and she had to wait to sweep my floor while my parents' and my brother's rooms were alr done, and she started rampaging and throwing things ard, i actually gave her attitude. i talked back to her. and i almost never do that. ive stayed silent for years while ppl shout at me and it's once in a blue moon when i actually get angry enough to shoot my mouth off. well today's one of those rare days. maybe a contributing factor is the hot weather. stifling hot today. and i'd wanted to go swimming.. but i woke up past noon and the CORS Closed bidding session starts at 1pm so i had to stay home to bid.. just made an appointment for my physio session at 6 pm so i doubt i'll get to swim today.

well yeah it's a bad day today.. my maid was making loads of noise as usual.. thrashing my stuff.. she's got high blood pressure and i think one day if she actually gets a heart attack becuz of that, i may think twice about helping her. cuz who ask her to get so angry so easily.. geez. yeah count me as evil but im not in a v charitable mood right now, and she usually gets angry over me and that makes me pissed too, so i prob wont feel v humane if she does get a stroke or smth in front of me. like she was making noise over my paper bags of packages that i left on the huge "wall" of plastic storage containers lining one side of my room. those storage containers were brought over from the computer room aka 2nd-level store room after my sis wanted to go sleep in the computer room lik last yr or the yr before. so half of my room became a store-room too. yeah after i receive my packages ill sort through what i can wear now and what ill have to slim down abit in order to look good in. ill put the latter back into the envelopes and put them all in big paper bags so ill know which shop they're from. yeah well i tot it's v neat alr since its only in one corner and not littered everywhere. however it seems that my mom has a problem with it and gawd knows why she keeps on putting pressure on my maid to clean up my room when she shld juz come thrash things out with me. lik wtf's wrong with moms? wtf's wrong with GEMINI moms? they keep on blaming the wrong people. sometimes they shld put more blame on themselves for a change.

another reason why im pissed today is cuz one of the online shops that ive placed orders from (4 dresses, which is quite alot) screwed up my orders and took super long to process it plus sold off one of the dresses that i ordered to another buyer. lik wtf. i paid them looooong looooong ago, and kept patiently waiting for a reply, then they emailed me saying they're not sure what i ordered so cld i clarify with them. i mean arent they supposed to keep the records, not me? i just pay the money. so aniwae i replied them but apparently they din get e email. so i waited again and again in vain. till a few days ago i got pissed and emailed them again. then the reply said the person who's handling my orders is overseas so she'll reply me as soon as she gets back. fine, i'll wait. then still no reply. so i emailed them today. and finally got a reply saying they sold off my dress and they'll give me a refund plus free registered mailing (like i even want it. im just fine with normal mail) to make up for it. hello?! such things dont make up for lousy service. geez. well that's prob the last time i deal with them. they're lucky i dont get all petty and give them a lousy rating, which i cld if i wanted revenge. arghh forget it.

yeah bad things started from yesterday. yesterday i went out early with huixin with the intention to have a fruitful shopping trip to buy the stuff that ive been needing. in the end we met up hours late -.- 2 hours late to be exact. wasted cab fare on my part. ok aniwae so we had lunch at Delifrance. i just had soup and a salad. the salad dressing kinda sucked.. ewk. sourish taste. so i had to buy a tankini, dance pants, and all the stuff that ive been wanting to get from Bugis St. we went to Queensway first and it was kinda a wasted trip for me. din buy much.. onli a nude-coloured camisole and swim goggles. spent $13 bucks in total (huixin paid $5 of the $13 for me so i spent only $8). huixin on the other hand, went crazy with the shopping n bought quite a few pieces of clothes. all from one shop! but i guess the shopkeeper was nice la. while we were there, 2 female students came in. they were wearing white n green so i tot they were from RJ. din realli take a good look. but wtf, they were so attitude and bimbo lah! they treated the old auntie shopkeeper lik she was their maid, ordering her ard, rifling through her clothes bins even after she'd said she din haf sizes available for them. so ill-brought up. the worse girl sounded lik she was an eurasian. then when they were gonna pay after all that trying on clothes and troubling the auntie, the eurasian girl realised she din haf money cuz her money had been stolen from her bag. den she started this whole tirade about who stole her money, calling up her classmates and accusing them of stealing from her. i mean, who would admit to stealing from u if u asked them straight lik that and in that awful bitchy manner aniwae? tink she deserves to be stolen from. what a bitch. and can u believe it? in the end they left the shop w/o buying anyth. later huixin told me they were from a neighbourhood sch. well i guess that explains their behavior but it doesnt make it any more justifiable. disgusting.

after queensway we rushed to kallang for huixin's cut-and-dye appt. and this is where all the trouble starts. we reached there at 4.30 pm right on time. so i sat by the side watching the whole process, taking photos of huixin looking lik a freak n all.. and tryin not to die of chlorine inhalation (i can't believe how those hairdressers n dye-ing customers stand the smell. gawd it's terrible!) huixin had a tuition session at 7.30 pm and we were actually supposed to go to Bugis after her appt and maybe haf a quick dinner. but the appt took too long and actually stretched past 7.30 geez.. =.= so i spent the 3 hours there in torment and in the end huixin took mrt with me to bugis and ran off and i had to go shop by myself. felt lik the whole day was quite wasted. i shant bitch too much about other things. -.-yeah aniwae huixin dyed her hair a light brown with ash blonde highlights at the bottom. quite a different look from before. i dno la i prefer her natural colour i guess. i dont quite like dye-ing. i guess when u haf a bf who dyes his hair ure kinda influenced to follow suit, esp when ure the type who likes to dye and pierce and all those kinda stuff. so yeah. shopped at bugis myself.. walked the level 1 maze.. goodness it's insane! i ended up buying 3 skinny belts and 1 pair of long leggings. tried on some jeans but i cldnt fit into even the largest size.. gawd.. speechless. i was so so tired by the end of it i was half-asleep on the mrt home. not an enjoyable day out, overall. shldve stayed at home probably. or went exercising.

yeah so at the end when i came home at 10 pm.. had just eaten dinner and went upstairs preparing to talk to dear, when i received a call from huixin's mom instead. she was hysterical on the phone, shouting n screaming and blaming me for her daughter looking lik one of those havoc women at orchard road. lik wtf? she kept asking me why i didnt stop her daughter from dye-ing her hair. u think i can stop huixin from doing what she wants meh? aniwae what's wrong with teenagers dye-ing their hair? it's lik the norm now. and the fact that i dont use makeup nor dye my hair nor wear super short shorts doesnt mean that ure daughter can't do all those right. what for compare with me? her mom has a serious problem of self-image la. what for she let other ppls' opinion rule her life. it's like she's counting on her kids to build up her own sense of self-respect. and that's trash, total trash. why can't she see past her daughter's appearance and look at the good points? and she kept saying im a bad fren "huai peng you", cuz i din "help her" and "stop huixin from dyeing her hair", all in mandarin of course. why shld i help u -.- im not your best fren, im huixin's best fren. and she kept saying "ni bu hao" to me, again and again and again, and saying that i let her down totally. and she said she tot i was "duan zhen" or smth liddat that's why she let huixin hang out with me. and she asked me if i tot huixin looked like a hooker and of course i said no, in huixin's defense, and she said "ni de yan guang bu hao". gawd. i really felt lik asking her to fuck off. i totally din deserve to have any of these said to me lo. and the worst part was that i couldn't defend myself cuz my mandarin sucks and all these simply took me by surprise. like who expects to return home to a bestfren's vengeful mom's shelling on the phone? man... my heart felt so stabbed after that lah. was on the verge of tears and cldnt wait for dear to call me but he took quite some time.. after that i cried on the phone to him. even now the memories still bring forth tears. then after that while talking to him i received two more calls from huixin's mom but rejected them both. can't deal with anymore of this shit. ive tried to be the bestest fren to huixin i cld possibly be, even dealing with some guo fen requests from her sometimes with no resentment, giving her all the advice i can think of, and now u come n label me a bad fren just cuz i can't do what u ureself can't do? and for what, when there's no problem with it at all? then huixin said her mom might try to call me again today. man. i dno lah, if she does, ill demand that we talk in english instead so i can deliver my argument eloquently. and i wont hold back. cuz ive always tried to be supportive n lend her a listening ear whenever she's called me to complain abt huixin, all the way from sec 1, and last night it seems lik all that didn't matter to her. how nice i'd been in the past din matter. all that mattered was that i hadnt "played my part" in her battle of wills against her rebellious daughter. well listen up sister! if im given a chance, i'm gonna let u have a taste of the pain u inflicted on me, in the clearest way possible. clear as crystal. cuz i dun take shit lik that from no one. NO ONE.

.....this wound is gonna take quite long to heal.

last night dear told me a typhoon was gonna hit taiwan at 3+ am that morning and i nearly went insane worrying, esp in my weakened mental state at that time after the shelling. well im glad dear's ok in the end =) tho the typhoon did descend upon them. sigh.. i love you dear =D

next time if my mom or dad ever talks to my frens lik that, i'm gonna waste no time in battling it out with them. so if my mom or dad or anyone in my family ever bullies u (by u, i refer to my frens n loved ones), just tell me. seriously. i will not let my loved ones get bullied or put down by any loser on this planet (other than me). lol! juz joking. but seriously, that kinda behavior is unacceptable.

hmm. my maid just came n gave me a snack to eat. its funny how her mood changes so fast.

just had another coughing fit =( sigh. its so hot today. and i am so angry.

reaching out again
5:04 pm

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